Happy Fourth!

Well, I've had enough of you guys, I'm going to take another break. J/K, I leave for Denver tomorrow afternoon to visit my friend, who works as a wrangler, at a camp out there. Turns out her sister is going to be there the whole time too. I was a little bummed about that but I guess I was just being selfish, thinking that I was paying all that money to go out there to see her and she's going to be hanging out with her sister... but we'll still have fun. I'm excited to be in the mountains again too! Anyways, I'll be back home late Monday so happy Independence Day!! (Make sure you take time to be thankful for our country. Man, it's easy to forget the freedoms we have and take for granted!!!)

I caught you a delicious bass...

Actually that would be Jen...all I caught was some little blue gills but that's alright, I showed my little brother up at least! My dad bought a fishing boat this past weekend from a friend of his. It is kinda old but it's still cool! It has those cool fishing seats, a screen that tells you where all the fish are and has a depth meter, and it even has a box in it that if you push a button it fills up with water and you can put fish in there! So yesterday was way too hot for us to go mnt biking so Jen and I went fishing. It was fun, It was kinda hard with 4 people in that size boat all trying to cast...one time I had a strang angle that I had to cast from so I went anyways and accidently threw my whole pole in the lake! My dad was kinda upset with me because it sank right away (why they dont' make floating fishing poles I have no idea) but we could still see my bobber so we started pulling the line up. The bad thing was that I hadn't "locked" my line cause I was in the middle of casting when it went out so we were thinkin' we'd keep pulling on the line and eventually it'd just run out without bringing back up the pole. So we (actually my dad:) ) kept pulling the line up and finally got the pole to the surface where we could grab it! Yea dad! haha I felt bad cause I've already broken one of his fishing poles and I didn't want to loose another one, but all in all it was pretty hilarious. And after all that, on the way home he actually said he would teach me how to back the truck up to put the boat in the water and take it out myself! He is actually going to let me take it out by myself! I have absolutely no idea how to drive a boat "but IIII am a very fast learner and..." (Jen, you know what movie that is from?) So anyways, a friend of mine just came over here with 3 kids she watches and we all played in the little blow up pool and the sprinkeler. That was fun, hopefully it wore the kids out so we will have nice long naps today! Aw, McKenna started telling me she loves me:) Well now she is screaming at me so it's time for sleep and me to clean!

this morning...

i am such a cop-out.


____________________________________________________________




HAPPPPPY BIRTHDAY TIFFANY JANELL DERKS!
I'm coming to see you in less than a week!

mOneY

There are so many times when I restle between whether or not I want to be rich when I grow up. It's not like I have a choice really but I just think about what I'd do either way. There are hard times/dangers with both I think. The couple I nanny for has a ton of money and things they do make me think about it the most. They are kind of addicted to work I think, and making money. This week was kind of a stressful week for me with just getting back from my trip and then working extra hours right when I get home, plus McKenna was really cranky and wouldn't sleep for me. They kinda figured that and payed me extra today. They said it was money so I'd stay. It made me kinda angry actually that they did that, thinking that money is going to keep me there. My attitude toward my job has been changing anyways lately and I've been thinking about quiting actually. I didn't think I'd ever want to quit but raising a kid who isn't your own is just too stressful. It's a good job giving me good experience but I'm starting to just think that I'd rather "experiment" on my own kids. I don't know, it's just getting harder. Especially with her "terrible two's" stage starting. Anyways, that just reminded me of how hard it would be to NOT become dependant on money if I were to ever have alot.

miss me?

Don't worry, I'm going to make up for all those days I missed, in this one post. I'm going to tell you all about my trip! June 8th I left for a 12 day trip to Israel with 6 of my friends from church, along with about 50 other people.

Well If you've been reading this lately you'll see that I changed it. I was going to summerize every day of the trip but for one thing it was just taking way too long cause we did and saw and learned so many things and also I just don't really like recapping, I decided:) I'm just gonna give like some summerys for you to read and I hope you enjoy!

Random things that I loved/learned through and about this trip:
1. Being in a different culture. The eastern way of thinking is incredible! It makes so much more sence! One example that sticks in my mind is ways we view God. We, in America, love to describe God in theological terms like omnipresent, omnipotent, powerful, love, great... say that list out loud with your eyes closed. What did you see? Now say these words closing your eyes - living water, shade in the desert, gentle breeze, good shepherd. Those are the things God is described as in the Bible. Those are words that we as humans naturally understand without having to memorize definitions. We know what water feels like when you are hot or thirsty. We understand shade and the effects of a soft breeze. That's why God uses those words to describe Himself in the Bible.
2. I was also impressed with their traditions. We heard the phrase alot, "To be a Jew is to remember." All their holidays, prayers, services, everything is done remembering something and they don't forget. I don't really know how to explain that more, but that was so neat.
3. Lastly, they ask questions. I don't know what else to say about that either but I just know that in America we like to think we have it all figured out and are too proud to ask questions.

Basically this was an "in-depth Bible lands tour." The purpose was to lead Groups of people through Israel, learning about the land in which the Bible was written. The things that are there are the things that the people of those times understood. It was amazing to learn about things that I thought I understood but it started to make so much more sence. We stood in the ruins of many cities where kings, priests and "celebraties" of the Bible stood. We walked through the valley where Goliath was killed with one little stone. Walked through the wilderness where the Israelites would have walked, where David sat watching sheep all day, where Samson was raised. We went to towns where Jesus' disciples lived, traveled and preached. We got to swim in the Sea of Galilee and the Jordan River. We prayed at the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem. It was such a neat experience, hard to explain everything and remember everything we were taught but...wow. I'll leave for now but if you want to know more just ask!

why we do the things we do

So I've been noticing quite a bit lately how influential other people's thought's/comments are in my decision making. Is it just me or do other people do that too? Sometimes it's not bad, it helps me make better decisions. Sometimes it just plain old helps me make decisions at all! Then there's times when it starts to annoy me:) For example: Last night we had a meeting with the group from our church who is going to Israel with us. It was 4 guys and 2 of us girls. Well the topic came up of luggage, what size suitcase we were going to fit all our stuff in, what size carry on we are bringing... Well I had debated about it earlier but grabbed the biggest suitcase we had in our basement and started packing it. We are gonna be gone 12 days! Well the guys were all saying how they could fit all their stuff in just the carry on and what not. It kinda made me feel dumb for packing a big 'ol suitcase and the other girl, Beka, mentioned it to me today too. She said they made it sound like we were bringing too much. I just said those guys have a way of manipulating people's minds but we shouldn't care what they say cause if we're allowed to bring a big suitcase then we might as well! It's not like I'm packing extra...I just have a ton of food and stuff I'll need, that kind of stuff takes up space! So anyways, It seems like every day there's different situations like that. I suspose I am not the only one in the world who "let's other people decide for them." Look at the groups of high school students walking around the mall sometime... they all look exactly alike. I guess I'll just keep doing it but try and at least consiously think about it and try and decide if it's good or bad:) I've noticed also, though, that I am attracted to people who do make their own decisions and don't try and make other people feel stupid for doing things differently. So guys, if you are reading this...;)

I'm starting to feel nervous about this trip. Flying used to excite me but now I'm just nervous....I've had to lie to people when they ask if I'm excited about the trip. I mean what am i susposed to say, um actually I'm not excited at all and kinda wish I could back out. Oh well, Pray the Lord will keep us safe, calm the nerves. Help me enjoy and learn muchos so i can come home and tell all my friends about it cause i wish they all could be there with me! Pray that I'll be honest with everyone too, lying is such an easy habit to get yourself into and stay in. All cause of the curs-ed thing we call pride, yucky.

the little things that bring joy...

Today wasn't all that bad of a day that I desperately needed cheering up or anything, but I got this letter in the mail that would have made me smile even on the worst of days. Does that make sence?
Dear Marissa,

We were told to write to our role model in school. I admire you for who you are, yourself. I know we haven't seen eachother in a while, but we're finding ways to keep in touch. You are a role model to me because you are always busy with McKenna, or have something important to do. Yet you always find time for family and God. You have also showed me that you can be anyone if you set your mind to it. I admire and love you very much. I hope to see you again soon.

Sincerly yours,
Aryn

It's so cute, all written out neatly and everything. She is in 5th grade, I've babysat her and her younger siblings for the past 9 years. A year ago I got a job nannying for a family full time so I barely ever see her anymore. She and her sister and brother always ask to have me babysit them and I finally get to this Saturday!
It is so special to get letters like that but at the same time it's a little weird. I can't think of how...but it is. Maybe because it's intimidating to know what people think of you. Maybe I think they are thinking too highly of me and don't really know me. Well no matter what, this letter is going to be saved for quite a while:)

Crazy

So the busy-ness starts, I leave in less than a week for Israel. Yeah, who would have thought I'd get to go to Israel. It still hasn't really hit home yet, but we're going to get to be in Jerusalem (yes, the same Jerusalem Jesus rode into on the donkey and everything else that happened there!), float in the dead sea...hm that's all I can remember right now. But it's just so totally crazy that we are going! I'm thinking (hoping) this will be a trip I won't ever forget!

So anyways before that, besides getting ready for the trip, I have a graduation I'm video taping Friday night, a wedding I'm taping Saturday and babysitting Saturday night. I get to watch these kids that I haven't babysat in forever! I think I've watched them like 2 or 3 times since I've started my new job, I miss them so much and what's even cooler is they miss me! Aw, it's so fun to be missed.

Me and McKenna went to the park this morning with Becky and Jabin, the little boy she watches. That was fun, it was nice and cool but after like an hour we were just like dripping sweat and we headed out. McKenna it napping right now and i just finished most of the cleaning. It's weird but I actually like cleaning, I hope when I have a house of my own ( hopefully soon!) that it will be the same. I try not and be a neat freak because that is annoying but I just really like everything organized and cleaned up, not really dirty. When ever I go to my friends' houses and see dishes sitting out on the counter or in the sink I want to wash them or put them in the dishwasher... One time I was at my friend Jen's house and they have a white sink that didn't really look white anymore, so I grabbed the soft scrub and had at it! haha I'm a dork but I enjoy it! Hopefully it'll be for the long run...

very first post!

Hey! So this is my very first post ever on something like this so bear with me. I have a couple friends who post "regularly" on these things and always thought it might be kinda fun to do the same, even if no one is listening. My job, as a nanny, requires me to be in constant contact with a 15 month old 10 hr/day for 5 days out of the week... I love the baby to death but you just miss talking sometimes. Most all my close friends work the same hours pretty much so it's not like we can just talk anytime we want. I've noticed this situation isn't very fun:) I'm not a huge talker but it is nice to have someone to voice your opinions, thoughts, experiences, and feelings to at times. I'm gonna try and do that on here, we'll see where it goes but for anyone who reads it, hope you enjoy getting to know the "real" me quite a bit better!